(h/t @Karoli)

This week, the Newtster’s campaign implosion just kept getting better. There was the Dancing Queen ringtone on his phone, his browbeating of Paul Ryan, followed by his apology to Paul Ryan. Apparently, this was all too much for his campaign spokesman, who shot off the following missive:

“The literati sent out their minions to do their bidding,” Tyler wrote. “Washington cannot tolerate threats from outsiders who might disrupt their comfortable world. The firefight started when the cowardly sensed weakness. They fired timidly at first, then the sheep not wanting to be dropped from the establishment’s cocktail party invite list unloaded their entire clip, firing without taking aim their distortions and falsehoods. Now they are left exposed by their bylines and handles. But surely they had killed him off. This is the way it always worked. A lesser person could not have survived the first few minutes of the onslaught. But out of the billowing smoke and dust of tweets and trivia emerged Gingrich, once again ready to lead those who won’t be intimated by the political elite and are ready to take on the challenges America faces.”

As over the top as it sounds, you really won’t get the true flavor of it unless you hear it performed by master thespian John Lithgow:

Brilliant. Simply magnificent. Bravo, the Gingrich.

This may have set the record for the quickest a major campaign has jumped the shark.